35

Kyle had never felt this much anger before.

  • Kyle had never felt this much anger before. Chad had just poured out all of his monster energy drink. Kyle punched another hole in his wall, but it wasn't enough.
  • Kyle's stepdad, Joseph, was a carpenter but not Richard or Karen. Whatever that means. When the spoon hit the floor we assumed your goose was cooked. Chad had bugged out earlier.
  • Chad is mad. He sits on the computer all day thinking of typing stupid stories.
  • Chad resolves to write the stupidest story ever. What's super stupid? A story with no plot? A story with no hero? A story with no location. All of the above he decides. Never upon
  • an empty void, not one single person, place or thing did anything ever. So much nothing happened that not even a single additional thing happened as a result! The concept of Chad
  • was a conceptual not perceptual occurrence in this world where nothing ever happens. Understandably, Chad was startled when the popup said he would be taken offline at 6 AM for
  • "maintenance", which of course meant that his Mom would be hauling him off to the bath tub for a good scrub. Chad cringed as he looked at the clock. 5:57- three minutes until that
  • dreadful knock at the door. He had to act fast. Chad stripped the sheets from his bed and tied them together with strong knots. 5:58. He flung the end of the makeshift rope out of
  • the window. 5:59. Chad started down the rope but had attached it to nothing. 6:00. Now on his ass on the sidewalk after he had fallen 3 floors, Chad cursed and stood up. 6:01. Chad
  • discovers that his knee is connected to his shoulder now. 6:02 Chad teeters on his good leg as he tries to figure out his new configuration. 6:03 Chad goes full CHAD.[roll credits]

4 Comments

  1. BlastedHeath Nov 05 2021 @ 22:59

    I like how this story started to have timestamps. If this were a movie, it would probably have some splitscreen moments, like in The Anderson Tapes.

  2. Woab Nov 06 2021 @ 11:37

    I like that Kevin's fold mentioned that Chad's story contained no person place, or thing, when actually, Chad can BE a person, place or thing.

  3. LordVacuity Nov 07 2021 @ 20:53

    Chad, a guy that looks like a Freddie that got fingered, yells to the pier from the stern of a boat. "Was it the Chad?" From the pier Drew Barrymore yells back, "Yes, It was you. It was the Chad."

  4. LordVacuity Nov 07 2021 @ 20:54

    I might be remembering that wrong. I'm just saying.

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