The depressed termite had had enough of wood.
- The depressed termite had had enough of wood. Wood, wood wood. That's all anyone ate around here. What about osso buco? What about
- the healing power of laughter after hearing a good joke? Did you hear the one about the termite who walked into a bar, and asked, "Is the bartender here?"
- So you see it was a termite and the bar... the bar was tender.... No, he wasn't really looking for the bartender... You're right, I guess bars might not serve insects...Anyway
- no one laughed & the termite remained thirsty. "Hey! What's a bug gotta do to get service here?" he shouted. Nada. Disgusted, the termite turned to the hungry hungry caterpillar &
- Said, "Well?" The caterpillar ran over the termite with a tractor full of diesel fuel and used him as fertiliser. The resulting crop of vegetables was canned by Mrs. Caterpillar.
- They were sold under the Wailing Pussy brand. It was a niche brand, to be sure, but it was making inroads with the Whole Foods crowd. Some claimed a mixing of vermiculture & bug la
- -xitives made for a fine compost tea that would boost one's immortality. A godlike creature leered from the label beneath the words "Are you willing to trade flavor for everlasting
- irregularity relief?” The godlike creature leering from the bottle label looked like Morgan Freeman snorting x-lax from a toilet bowl while shouting, “The cocaine of immortals.”
- "Snorted by the Almighty himself!" The bottle leapt out of my hand and started sprinting about the room. I leapt after it, but I was no Bruce Almighty at catching rogue M. Freeman
- And this is why no one ever plays "Spin the Bottle" with God.
- Started
- 2013-07-06 20:04:36
- Finished
- 2020-03-27 15:30:41
1 Comments
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Woab Mar 28 2020 @ 13:48
Ooh, that's a damned good ending, OnyxFlame!