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The men just fell down from the walls to

  • The men just fell down from the walls to sit at the table, all around me. Empty eyes judging, weighing my failures. The blind mutes preaching their Darknesses, their transgression,
  • their nakazaniye, their forgiveness, their forgetfulness, their table manners -- or was all that just me? I had eyes and a tongue, and so I looked at the blind mutes and said "hey"
  • They stared back at me with their head, grey eyes and said, ¨Greetings madam, would you like some tea?¨
  • Well, you know me - I always enjoy a spot of tea, so I decided to sit down with them. The beady-eyed group seemed pleased by my company. That is, until I accidentally spilled
  • my tea onto the floor. I don't know what provoked him, but one of them took offence. "That's so f'ing rude, man!" he barked. "You should be apologizing to the people sitting here!"
  • But I refused. This became known as the "Tea Incident", and is the reason I am no longer invited to parties. Who wrote the rules on tea etiquette anyway? I bet it was some sort of
  • Stuck up, filthy rich dad with daughters. Daughters with a huge tea addiction. Such a bad addiction to the drink that rules were needed. Who makes rules for tea?
  • Rules for Tea: 1) Elbows off the table. 2) Pinkies raised. 3) Carbonated and/or alcoholic beverages not allowed, unless concealed in teacup. 4) NO COFFEE! 5) Animals must wear
  • fancy clothes and big hats. 6) At least 3 old women who gossip. 7) Passive aggressive attacks on each other's promiscuity or lack of decorum concealed as a polite sounding joke.
  • 8) constant recommendations of the barber Sweenie Todd. 9) Fancy pearls and a sweet cup of tea. 10) nightly worship of the demon Ba'allzebub. 11) a visit from the grandkids.
Started
2018-07-17 00:39:44
Finished
2019-12-17 14:34:30

6 Comments

  1. Avatar

    Toogs Dec 17 2019 @ 14:38

    Rule #9 for tea: have a cup of tea.
  2. Avatar

    revital Dec 17 2019 @ 15:10

    ^^^ ????
  3. Avatar

    LordVacuity Dec 17 2019 @ 15:48

    Sorry folks, these rules don't fit in with a cha-no-yu. brb, have to seppuku, I'm just saying.
  4. Avatar

    SlimWhitman Dec 18 2019 @ 15:18

    not clear what's a bigger trial, worship of Ba'alzebub, or visit of the four grandkids
  5. Avatar

    BlastedHeath Dec 21 2019 @ 22:47

    That went well.
  6. Avatar

    Gibber Dec 22 2019 @ 18:33

    This is another fold of mine actually written by a neural network. https://talktotransformer.com/

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