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Things to do before I die: 1. See the Northern

  • Things to do before I die: 1. See the Northern Lights. 2. Go skydiving. 3. Visit Australia. 4. Win the lottery.
  • I completed my bucket list in one fell swoop by winning the lotto (I'm a white male) to buy a ticket from Nome to Australia. Then the plane engines sputtered & died. My parachute
  • prolonged the inevitable (I lost some lottos too: My life support ran on gravitational potential energy). I'd surely die when I touched down Down Under, unless my moon shoes' claim
  • ticket hadn't expired. The autostem would continue to palpitate the oxygen mucus until I could return the moon shoes. Ever since the Heatclipse dissolved all the
  • aspirin my banging headache returned. I went in search of moon berries on the dark side of the Moon. Without Sir Patrick Moore to guide me I got lost around a moon
  • dome. GPS doesn't work on the moon. It's easy to make a wrong turn and end up retracing your own footprints. I looked at the prints. "These belong to Madam Swift. She has the only
  • stiletto heels on the Moon. And these other prints were probably made by her boytoy Jethro Concubine, who has a contract with Destiny Shoes." I concealed my envy. The inv
  • erted nipple mountain was also destroyed by their careless shoe prints...all in the name of personal gain! The Moon would never be the same. I wanted a piece of the action.
  • "Houston, I want a piece of the action," I whispered, but I knew they could hear me. "5,000 acres of prime lunar real estate, or I blow it all to smithereens!"
  • Houston capitulated. My next mission was to Mercury piloting a probe named Messenger, but when I pulled the same stunt they just laughed so I crashed on the far side of the sun.
Started
2012-09-24 01:36:19
Finished
2015-05-05 03:26:08

1 Comments

  1. Avatar

    SlimWhitman May 05 2015 @ 03:29

    You can't escape the law of gravity.

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