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"Well maybe if you didn't spend so much time

  • "Well maybe if you didn't spend so much time on that stupid Folding website or whatever it is, you'd have time to take out the trash." Ohhhhh. I closed my laptop. "Well maybe
  • I will write you into my first fold! Maybe that would shut you up!" I turned around and she wasn't there. What happened? Then I realized I forgot to mention her in fold two.
  • And so that was the way it would have to be. Each fold adding a person and the next dropping them, as if the fold were a forgotten memory or a life short lived. Each fold quietin
  • g down the preceding it until the folded story got really, really small...like a paper football folded up tightly...you know the kind we used to ping at each other in school? Folds
  • like that last one make for great paper footballs, but they make even better shurikens. Imagine, a FoldingStory Throwing Star. You could take out your enemies in complete
  • bam bam from behind. This is Foldingstory critical theory at it's zero level.
  • You might think that foldingstory contributers aren't a bunch of Marxist intellectuals, but you'd be wrong. They genuinely do worry about the means of production of stuff like
  • Jägermeister and computer batteries. Yesterday I saw a Marxist fold written by the very intellectual <REDACTED> re: the necessary economic activity required to produce toilet paper
  • for wiping the upper classes behinds. <REDACTED> proposed organizing the workers into the Bog Roller's Front and TP the Bourgeoisie into their homes. Are you that revolutionary?
  • Sadly, this call for greatness remains unanswered to this day, because malnutrition has populated our mouths with speech impeding canker sores.

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