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He was a melancholic phlegmatic with a mission:

  • He was a melancholic phlegmatic with a mission: have the lowest score on FoldingStory. After months of research he had discovered that the folds that got the least amount of points
  • were of 7 words or less, completely unrelated to the previous fold, and offensive. For example, to "Frowning, Sally gently shampooed the furry ball creature with" he would add:
  • "Jorge Titsworth, watching, masturbating, & laughing." It made no sense, but strangely, other foldsters voted for his folds. Truth be told, he was a passive-aggressive folder. He
  • -Man and the Masters of the Universe!. Wow! Childhood cartoon slogan turrets just interrupted my fold.
  • "Can't you do that somewhere else?" I said and did a faceplam. That big idea I was working on went out the window with He-man's might declaration: "I. HAVE. THE POWER!"
  • The Krell machinery picked up the bassline to "I. HAVE. THE POWER!" He-Man was somewhat outnumbered by all the buxom heroes flashing their nips. But not Picard. My faceplam
  • to all your faceplam as I forgive your transgressions against your neighbors and ultimately me, The Reason you left in the wilderness, the Reason you scoffed at her tears, that Rea
  • Son you fell asleep on the #81 bus and woke up in a cat cafe, having become one yourself. The table you slept on was unoccupied until your mum, a tortoiseshell herself, asked you
  • "What kind of cat mother had she been to allow you to become a cat cafe that slept on a table that she shared with her mother who questioned her own mothering." You thought that un
  • -derneath that odd statement was some sort of trueism. You pondered every word of it for months until you went completely mad. And then you understood. Oh yes, you understood.

2 Comments

  1. Woab Jun 07 2017 @ 12:13

    Now it all makes sense.

  2. BlastedHeath Jun 15 2017 @ 21:14

    FoldingCubism or something

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