The Hipster businessman founded a Holy Smokes
- The Hipster businessman founded a Holy Smokes Spirit Association to really cash in on all the
- herbal hype and ironic-in-quotes faux smoking by the neighborhood hipsters. He also sold the little fedoras they so loved. Unsuspected by them, he added a "treat" to each hat.
- He knew if they found out. The hats would suddenly go from a small hipster craze to a war between the fashion forward and the not-so stylish. He could never let them know.
- He lit the match and dropped it, walking out of the fedora factory as it burned to the ground. Just another day's work for the elite fashion police anti-hipster squad.
- Next, they'd torched the Urban Outfitter's headquarters located, oddly enough, in Paint Lick, Kentucky. Heidi Klum was his idol and so when he spotted her (sans Seal), he'd leaped
- next to the cardboard cutout and started air-humping it with wild abandon, much to the delight of his fellow vandals. Yes, this was going to be a bad night for Corporate Capitalism
- , but a good night for the cardboard cut out who'd never got so lucky. Next the vandals focused on bringing down capitalism by ditching their branded clothes. Now naked they jumped
- around the McDonald's yodeling in the buff. "Let's eat sushi and not pay! Occupy Wallmart! Oraganize Anarchy!" They called themselves the Performance Art Nude Dadaist Association.
- I left my house to aquire a hamburger but i didnt have any cash. I decided to go for a hamburger because sushi is very nasty. Nobody wants to eat raw fish wrapped in a rice cake.
- Approaching the burger vendor I said "I'll gladly pay you Tuesday for a cheeseburger today!" He said "No, that's impossible. But I have some day-old ceviche you can have for free."
- Started
- 2012-02-27 23:39:59
- Finished
- 2014-04-28 13:38:44
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