He placed the watch next to his sudoku. He
- He placed the watch next to his sudoku. He had to finish the puzzle in under a minute if he were ever to get into the international finals in Beijing. To add pressure, he ate
- a steamed Char Siu Pork bun, the mid-competition snack of his nemesis, Dr. Feng. Feng had crushed him on two previous occasions and the smell of the bun transported him back to
- that time his mom left him at Denny's. He didn't know why he always thought about it, but who can blame him? Eating a Grand Slam by oneself is an experience even more damaging than
- being stripped down to your skivvies in front of your entire bible study class while being spoon-fed marmalade. It was a bad day to quit huffing glue. Father DiAngelo
- transported your to another dimension
- called Home For Infinite Losers. I punched the barren ground and my in despair and fury screamed "It's over nine thousand WHAT??" But the only thing they could tell me was
- my name, rank and cereal number. The test wasn’t over. I was slowly forgetting everything I was, had been. Nine days of
- eating nothing but this bland oatmeal. I'm not even sure they were real oats, but what could I do? They had my cereal number. Bowl after bowl piled up, becoming an awful cementy
- that encouraged bad Monty Python references. "Look at the bowls!" My companions would cry, as they attempted a horrendous Scottish accent. Life is hell, but
- my life is the equivalent of that special place where the Devil himself personally sodomizes you. Maybe I should go back to the day job.
- Started
- 2011-04-24 10:12:51
- Finished
- 2011-04-25 20:52:01
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