The page stared blankly back at me. Its

The page stared blankly back at me. Its alabaster facade with horizontal lines looked like a cheap, closed venetian blind, blocking out the light of creativity. This deadline had
me by the balls. I'd known about it for sme time of course, but now that my editor was calling on the regular I couldn't type a damn page. I stood up
and announced that I was a member of the So Solid Crew and you all got 21 seconds to
run the hundred meters with flippers and handcuffs. I was good at sports & could sing, but this was ridiculous. I decided to cheat the system by
hiding a nail file up my nose. The Olympic committee felt the Swimming-Karaoke-Escapist Triathilon would be only a demonstration sport, so I probably could get away with it. Others
were hiding Dora floaties and auto-tune programs in their anuses and various other cavities and orifices. This wasn't your dad's Olympics. But the biggest difference these days
was the events. for example, one of the many Terrible Olympic events included Killing Godzilla armed with nothing but a toothpick. Seemed easy enough, so i signed up. However,
it wasn't as easy as it looks on TV. I ended up losing both arms due to Godzilla's teeth but at least I got a couple million dollars and a contract with ABC for the Bachelor show.
"Full moon and no arms," I thought. Well that's the way love goes.
So it was said, and so it was. Sometimes you eat the bear, and sometimes the bear eats you.

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