A long time ago, a young boy was capturated

A long time ago, a young boy was capturated by a group of thiefs when suddenly the key of his cage was seen by him. He takes of his hand and tries to catch it. (Noel)
"NOOOO, set me free!!!" This can't be done!!! You will be put in jail!!!!"
Screamed the the first grader when his mother dropped him off for his first day of school.
"Free at last! Free at last!" his mother muttered beneath her breath as she sped away from the school. "Thank Gawd a'mighty, I'm free at last!" She immediately felt guilty. Kids
were such a pain in ass, though. Dropping them off at school felt like the day she asked her neighbour if she could dump her extra trash in their bin, and her neighbour said yes.
Trash and children were quite alike in some respects:both stink,start to pile up at some point and it's difficult to get rid of them for good.That said,I truly love children.I do.
They're just a lot of work. It was never my intention to end up with children but here I am. Surrounded by three of them. I have a lot to do and so little time.
Inspicuous disposal. Toxicological eradication. Irrefutible alibis. For all of us.
The news anchors shuffled in their chairs and looked nervous when it came time to read the headlines. They desperately wanted to believe it was true and had to pretend instead.
"Ahem. The EPI has announced wage growth in the US has increased so that we'll all be rich by 2019. Also, a major ISIS offensive in Iraq was countered successfully by Canada. Bye!"

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