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My day started like any other day. I woke

  • My day started like any other day. I woke up to the sound of a crying baby, a yelling mother, and drenched in sweat due to no air conditioning. However, little did I know
  • that outside my doom was waiting for me in the form of a giant robotic cow. I showered, fed the baby, silenced my mother and left the house for work. That was when I saw it.
  • The robocow was trampling my lawn and stood between me and my car. I thought I could outrun it, but it startled me with its speed. I dashed back inside the house and slammed the do
  • ily onto the coffee table. Robocow, shmobocow - I refused to be trapped in the house by her brute strength. Grabbing a pack of industrial bolts and grass,
  • I clipped her utter lengthwise and stuffed it full of hay. In response, the mechanical bovine started stroking my hairy chest with her titanium hooves. "Moo. Moo-moo" she whispere
  • in my ear. "Give me a tingle with your cattle prod." Whoa!! I'm not into that. What kind of mechanical cow lover do you take me for?" I got out of "Bessie's Beasts Lovehotel" befor
  • -e I was branded as a beast of burden and made my way into town, where the cat-houses were for those with only two legs. In the distance I heard a faint moo-ing, and knew I had to
  • churn the butter soon. Sure enough, as soon as we got to the green commons I was called on to turn the crank of their metal & wood contraption that among other things churned the b
  • utter and fingers together. But it was preferable to being assigned to the Nutter Butter station. Across the green commons, I saw
  • the zombies enter the Nutter Butter station; it was fated that zombies would eat 5000 workers. But they were saved by the Butterfingers, which the zombies ate & abruptly exploded.
Started
2015-02-12 14:57:59
Finished
2020-04-30 19:33:19

1 Comments

  1. Avatar

    BlastedHeath May 02 2020 @ 17:32

    Someday, nut allergies might save us all.

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