2 Folds
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1
A one-eyed soldier spat over the castle wall towards the approaching legion of enemies."Ever danced with death kid?" he asked a younger man. "It's never too late to learn to tango" -
3
a rat sitting among the pitiful remains of my KFC meal. I stomped to the counter "Excuse me! My name is Karen, I have a pixie cut, 2 children and a divorce. Where's the manager!"
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2
Thus began the nun grammar nazi takeover of Earth. Those that were against it found themselves in a hot place poked by pitchforks so no one minded learning proper Latin too much.
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6
An old lady found him in that alley and for years to come she would tell the epic tale of the unconscious trashcan loving "Hamilton" guy from the alley at the back of the complex .
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4
But in Soviet Russia virus doesn't infect you, you infect virus. And so, instead of creating zombies, the virus mutated to infect people with russian speach and liking vodka.
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5
One, two, three. Four, five six. I want this to rhyme. Drumsticks.
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3
There was only one thing left to do. I wiggled my arm free and somehow managed to rip a piece of my undies to wave weakly as a sign of surrender while being tied down. They looked
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4
wasn't enough to override their common sense. Not even an idiot would dring from a sulfury pool. They skipped that cavern and kept travelling further down in the hot, dark caves.
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4
Little did I know, a few other people had the same idea after watching that movie. The bar turned into a cry fest as we ordered more tissues than alcohol. Thankfully, I managed to
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4
The end of the world begins in 10 days. On the first day, every shoe in existence will have a pebble in it that can't be removed. On the second, people will trip over everything.
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5
was it then. I passed out from the lack of oxygen, banged my head on a table and my script scattered everywhere. Later I woke up in a hospital, saw the bill, and passed out again.
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4
with the power of an unlimited data plan. The thugs didn't have time to enter the captcha before the knight crashed through them and rode off into the sunset of net neutrality.FIN
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3
Or maybe it was called the High Council because they liked to smoke mushrooms. Or the one that wrote this smoked mushrooms. Or maybe both. Anyway, I was determinet to get the job.
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4
Ugh, that was lame. She gave me a look and a tiny smile and I wondered if she was laughing at me or found me cute. "Uh, can I see your painting?". At that her smile dissapeared and
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6
Nobody ever asked how the sidekick felt. It was always 'build this' and 'research that' and then boom, bang ant huzzah - the hero got all the credit. Well, Bob would change that.
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2
sad as he looked it over. They had removed the funny puzzles from the back of the boxes. He liked playing those quite a lot. Oh well, there was only one thing left to do.
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3
the divorce. The guinea pig was the only thing she left me. Dad wasn't very good at comforting me. He wanted to get me a dog, but I loved my current pet more than anything. His nam
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6
She then spent a few moments wondering how exactly a fire-breathing behemoth develops something as trivial as a cold. Oh well, the potion was almost ready, purple, bubbly and ...
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3
A bit of an old-fashioned way to do someone in but it was the only thing I had at the time. After all, I didn't spend hours googling 'gruesome ways to die' to stick to cliches. Per
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3
nearest water supply, which happened to be a flower vase on the table. It was the stinkiest, nastiest, slimiest liquid concoction I had ever had the misfortune of tasting, but...