3 Folds
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they should have played with nerf guns instead. Delirious from the bloodloss and sight of maimed corpses, these idiots -
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the picture--literally. With each stroke, he lost a portion of his body, which then appeared in the page. Trapped,
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her fists into my pants, instantly discovering my giant, squishy mass of....silly bandz!
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in Amherst, disguised as obnoxious Red Sox fans. No one would ever suspect that their fanaticism was a coverup for
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a family reunion at Disney World. The security guards dressed like Pluto and Goofy escorted me to Splash Mountain, where
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Carlo Rossi invented the giant wine jug. With each step in the pool, the smashed and bruised fruits absorb
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limiting access to the dog park by pooping along the perimeter and not providing clean-up baggies. But the felines
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drop the kids off at the pool. He stumbled to the edge of the boardwalk when the urge suddenly hit. If he moved
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Actually, she'd be seeing her own face reflecting off my bald head because I was too busy motorboating to look up. Hah!
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wasn't in a "wax-on, wax-off" kind of mood today. He decided to take it intravenously. Strapping the belt to his arm,
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1990, like slap-bracelets and hyercolor shirts. So, to teach these young thugs a lesson, we hopped on a short bus to
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Bring me a two-fingered scotch and some string cheese. Really, you should try it. One time in Dubai, I mistakenly
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forgot to turn off the coffee pot! Luckily, the cat likes Folgers and will lap up any that spills over. The last time
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But, let's be honest, I'm a pretentious asshole who thinks Whole Foods is affordable and never sets foot in the hood. So
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chomping on taquitos--damn I love those things--and sipping mysterious beverages from brown bags. If I saw them there,
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Narnia, so he decided to look for the closest lion, witch, and wardrobe. Instead, he came across a troupe of circus
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slide head-first with his hands over his spectacles. The mud flew all over his wild mane of white-boy dreds and
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I'm so lazy at work that I don't even bother to get up to pee. Instead, I
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were only playing a game of parchesi. But even that was too much for him. Hearing even the slightest roll of the dice
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go look for some hood-rat Hos; they're the only ones who think a Pinto is a hot ride. Blaring the tunes of Hendrix,