Once upon a time, in the magical land of HELL...

Murdock Lipschitz carefully removed the cylinder he'd labeled with RADIOACTIVE WASTE

Take it from me: When making a point about how easy it is to write a haiku, be sure to not screw up the syllable count. You just look silly. "Haikus are so easy/ In my sleep I make

I love to eat lemons in the spring time

In the beginning, there were 1,800 potential characters. Then just like that, there were 1,620.

The morning after: She nuzzled up to him and then licked him with her raspy tongue. We woke with a start. There was an enormous capybara in his bed.

Apparently they're not making Twinkies any more. Well, you might as well just tell me the world's coming to an end because I don't want any part of a post-Twinkie life.

5, 4, 3, 2...

The highest of honours have endowed me today. A writer named Ambika, of whom had higher stature than me, decided to follow my path in the Quest of the FoldingStory. My joy was

My grayish mane of hair was still quite popular with the ladies. Maybe they associated it with affluence. But during three nightmare filled days in January it all turned white.

When I put a package with a running vibrator in front of the principals office as a prank, I really didn't expect the evacuation or bombsquad, but

Morton's resolve to "alway's take the stairs" as his doctor had ordered was severely taxed when he had a meeting on the 99th floor of the Willis Tower. On floor 78 he collapsed

I d d d don't remem m m m ber when I began t t t t to stutter. When I was a ch ch ch child, half of my

The CEO was an avid collector of Star Wars memorabilia & this was his prize catch. He had it installed in his office. He sat down in the Emperor's throne & paged Ms. Beazly

"Do no mistake inaction for laziness or misjudge a choice for peace as weakness." The student replied, "I'm not gonna lie, I feel very vulnerable after a nap."

Everything is quiet in Comstock. The sun is shining, the birds are chirping, and everything seems to have an "It's Friday" air about it. The only thing that is different is the

Anytime you want to meet someone over the internet, take my advice. Don’t. Instead, take the time to

Nothing quite made sense anymore. Was it the lights? Was it the alcohol? Was it the drugs? All Vivian knew was that the world immediately around her was nothing like what she'd

When they were younger they were stoners, but now it's crystal meth. They are perfect for eachother. He has a huge supply of razors, and she is covered in cuts. They both look

When I think back to the moment I met the love of my life I get a warm tingling feeling in my heart and a tear will often start to roll down my cheek. I didn't know at the time