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53
The second thoughts he had after he plummeted over the Niagra Horseshoe Falls in an inflatable bouncy ball were swiftly erased by the tonnage of fresh water fast approaching.
Finished
2013-03-28 01:41:14
Took
1 year, 186 days, 45 minutes, 11 seconds
19
Distant thunder rumbled through the air and ground, shaking a shack in the mountains that contained a fugitive of the law.
Finished
2013-03-28 23:58:02
Took
1 year, 239 days, 10 hours, 42 minutes, 1 second
29
Some people call it a swing blade but I call it a kaiser blade, I think i will go with Billy Bob Thorton and end up calling it a......
Finished
2013-03-28 23:59:33
Took
1 year, 230 days, 15 hours, 8 minutes, 33 seconds
38
I had the least stressful job in the world: traffic man for the 3 am local news. Usually I just got in front of the camera and said, "Open roads, folks!" But tonight was different.
Finished
2013-03-29 00:01:19
Took
1 year, 222 days, 4 hours, 27 minutes, 24 seconds
36
The Sun and I aren't on speaking terms. We are both at fault, I suppose; she's been disappearing every night, and I've been seeing a tanning bed. We tried galactic counseling, but
Finished
2013-03-29 00:03:46
Took
1 year, 211 days, 23 hours, 30 minutes, 4 seconds
25
I decided that I was not going to make excuses for him anymore, he had put his hands on me one time too many. I was through telling my friends and family that I fell, or bumped in
Finished
2013-03-29 00:06:23
Took
1 year, 149 days, 12 hours, 23 minutes, 25 seconds
46
Dear Josef, I hope that you will make better use of "The Card Tricks of Enoch" than I, a scatterbrain, will ever do. I am old enough to wonder whether I am being manipulative, but
Finished
2013-03-29 00:11:45
Took
226 days, 4 hours, 10 minutes, 26 seconds
31
It was 10:30 at night. The sky had turned a sullen orange, and Jake felt more alive than ever before. The blood that oozed from his ears and eyes didn't worry him. The green ooze
Finished
2013-03-29 00:14:06
Took
219 days, 11 hours, 42 minutes, 23 seconds
39
He fell in love with her smile. The lines of crooked teeth like a miniature stonehenge begged for his orthodontic prowess.
Finished
2013-03-29 00:16:48
Took
202 days, 6 hours, 16 seconds
43
"Arthur...ARTHUR..." she croaked. Arthur wouldn't answer. He hated her. Hated her voice, hated her face, hated everything about her. In general, he hated all frogs and this was
Finished
2013-03-29 00:18:55
Took
164 days, 4 hours, 7 minutes, 17 seconds
41
He was reincarnated as a bacterium living inside the colon of a maggot living in a festering rat turd in a sewer beneath a squalid slum. He looked on the bright side. "At least
Finished
2013-03-29 00:20:26
Took
133 days, 6 hours, 51 minutes, 34 seconds
39
"Afar Lugbúrz! at sapat kok-ishi. Afar vadokanuk, At sapat kok-ishi!"
Finished
2013-03-29 00:22:10
Took
80 days, 10 hours, 3 minutes, 37 seconds
62
"Hello and thank you for purchasing the Orgreenic Zero Point Energy Stove and Slushee Machine. To get maximum satisfaction from this product, please follow these instructions with
Finished
2013-03-29 00:24:42
Took
29 days, 3 hours, 2 minutes, 16 seconds
41
It was late, the glitter eyeshadow was wearing off, my feet were killing me from the platform furry boots and going to IHop sounded like a perfect way to end this horrid night. My
Finished
2013-03-29 00:26:25
Took
22 days, 11 hours, 18 minutes, 58 seconds
60
I'm feeling pretty down. Sure, there's the wife, kids, job, car, house, etc. etc. but what's it all about? Work work work, worry worry, stress. Eat, sleep, repeat. I think I'll buy
Finished
2013-03-29 22:14:11
Took
1 year, 196 days, 9 hours, 53 minutes, 8 seconds
30
So, I was just accused of cyber bullying, but I think it was justified and not yet to the level of a hate crime.
Finished
2013-03-30 21:49:50
Took
25 days, 6 hours, 57 minutes, 14 seconds
30
Rasputin licked the powdered sugar from Marie Laveau's chin. "What shall we do with the people of earth, ma cherie? They are so depressingly easy to mesmerize. What is to be done?"
Finished
2013-03-31 20:17:25
Took
1 year, 258 days, 23 hours, 16 minutes, 47 seconds
43
Bananas suddenly burst forth from a hole in the wall as Cindy skipped down her school's hallway, preventing her from reaching her destination: PS 105, Advanced Geometry.
Finished
2013-04-01 02:56:48
Took
1 year, 337 days, 9 hours, 31 minutes, 40 seconds
54
Being a sentinent form of energy has its drawbacks. As if not being able to give hugs wasn't bad enough, today I was invited to a birthday party and I realized
Finished
2013-04-01 19:36:29
Took
83 days, 20 hours, 56 minutes, 45 seconds
26
"Listen to this, you old motherfucker!", John yelled at to the officer. "I built all those goddamn bombs myself! I fixed them up and fine tuned them, fine tuned them for everything
Finished
2013-04-01 19:59:51
Took
185 days, 14 hours, 59 minutes, 16 seconds
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