as the baby elephant watched it's mother fall to the ground; in a panic it wondered what it could do to help her

The midday sun scorched the asphalt of a highway stretching through the desert. Rita found a nice big rock and dropped in on the accelerator and put the convertible in drive.

"Welcome to Cannibal Cafe. Our special tonight is a Limb Burger topped with Limburger and toematoes." Andrew Zimmern studied the menu with trepidation. "I think I'll have the

Joe had just hit the pope with his truck. There were no witnesses. The situation was surreal. He left the cab and checked the pope's pulse. The pope had no pulse. He put the

I have no intention of appearing in this foldingstory. However,

All of the world's problems began billions of years ago with a single belch.

'It's crying in my heart like it's raining on the town'

I'm not gonna give much to work with...Let's just say that

MEMO to all citizens. Christmas is cancelled, effective immediately. Please proceed directly to December 31. Happy new year!

I sheathed myself in the garments fitting my caste and then I went to work just as I'd done every day since my extrusion. My task was unsavory, but I was congealed for this purpose

Buy Oxiclean for 29.95 (plus tax) and save -29.95 (plus inheritance)! Go to your local Super Market to buy Oxiclean!

Einstein and Marilyn Monroe were having a row because HE wanted kosher hotdogs at the reception but SHE didn't think that was classy. Then she threw her engagement ring at him sayi

Thomas Carnacki knocked softly on the weathered grey seaside shanty. "Mrs Squidmore, I'm sorry for your loss and of course I would be happy to help with the phantasms you mentioned

Petunia practiced en pointe on her trunk - her pink tutu like upsidedown tulip petals. All the other young elephants laughed. But she had ambition.

The fluffy cat trotted through the yard with a fat, juicy dove in her smiling mouth. She ran past the window of her house where her family sat eating dinner. Their jaws dropped.

And now, the moment you've all been waiting for. It is my pleasure to introduce the greatest squirrel in all of Acornia, Jasper McNutters.

Every day he had to deal with the same thing. The same job, the same home, the same words. He felt like he was just repeating the same day. But that'd be ridiculous...right?

The story of Game of Gnomes was about different gnome families competing via hopscotch battles for ground in the garden. The gnomes who occupied the rose garden

A bizarre scene unfolded at the ER, as doctors rushed around a talking propeller. He began: "Well, i was facebooking, and then I hit the 'Become A Fan' button" he groaned.

Johnny hasn't been the same since he got back from 'Nam. Sometimes I can still hear him scream,