Dump wrasslin'. Who wants ta watch nekkid sweaty men grabbin' their thongs? An' what's this. Discus throw? That's s'posed ta be oh-riginal recipe Olympic sport? It's a Frisbee for

When New York's Macys unfurled the balloons for another Thanksgiving's day parade, no one knew what had been left in the back in 1924.

"There, how does that feel?" "Oh, you put it in already?" Chuckle. "Yes, I told you it was small. We're going to put another one in. How's that?" "Fine, I guess." Acupuncture

Slim pushed aside the old AM radio. The dust made him cough. "It's got to be here somewhere," he grumbled "Or else

The man on the cellphone talked loudly. He was like a klaxon with a bad script. He was white but yucked it up like House of Payne. The people around him were trying to enjoy

The file cabinet contained it all. When she was blabbing with the others she never let her eyes rest on it. No no no no. That would be too obvious. But when she was sure she was

When the "Association" had taken over the energy ports, they'd placed a ton of new restrictions and tariffs that of course slowed everything down. But he could wait

Un día de primavera Laura va eixir de sa casa per anar a l'escola. Com pensava que faria un poc de fresca portava una jaqueta blava damunt de la camisa. Al poc d'anar caminant

He didn't much like opera, but frequented opera cafes to hit on the singing waitresses. He was addicted to the ecstatic involuntary songs they sang during orgasm

Yo that infamous woods poet is back in your earhole. I serve game in forested areas with lyrics like 'yo squirrel, suck on deez nuts!' and 'c'mere bunny rabbit, take a nibble

I could never remember the date, although I had a photographic memory. I could still remember the luscious red roses I passed when I walked to school. But now I needed the date as

Harpreet Singh was a NCY cabbie. He loved his job. His prodigious memory and friendly chattiness made him the best cabbie in the city. He never forgot a face or an address until

I opened the refrigerator, from top to the bottom it was filled with capers, maraschino cherries, pimentos, and variety of other pickled whimsies. But where was the food?

It was a turnip. Big fat fettid gritty root vegetable. It sat on the Starbuck's counter, pointing it's weird wiry little root tip thingy at

Looking out over the canyon, Stan wondered how it had come to this. The last thing he remembered was jamming in the suppositories and then it was all a blur. He had a faint

You live across the street. You have no neck. A man on a motorcycle visits infrequently. You are blonde, but clearly not having more fun. Hunchback mama please

I wanted to make a warm and fuzzy crayola drawing of two puppies playing tug 'o war with a tube sock. Then the owner smiling. The caption reads, "Fuck the police." If I gave

He asked her to do it. His tone was conciliatory. His face sympathetic. But his request for this particular kind of human perversion was very far past any normal favor. He

He drove his jeep into the hotel. 50 pounds of explosives taped to his chest. He pressed the detonate button and nothing happened. He pressed it again. Nothing.

The clown smirked. Evilness oozed from the sewer. "Come down an play." But the hellish clown did not know he was beckoning a special child. His name was Harry Potter and he came