"I don't get it," Qwerty said. "Who did what again?" "Oh my God," Asdf said. He had already told Qwerty about it three times. "Are you even listening?!"

the deep darkness of this room makes the best hero's to shiver to run away like a baby. and what do you expect from a real baby to do that cold breeze on my face it makes the hairs

My parents gave me advice like "Don't talk with your mouth open." and "Hold my hand while crossing the street. I don't want to die alone."

Carlos woke up, had breakfast, went to work, ate and came back home. Everyday. But that morning, when he opened the door, there was no street outside, just a neverending sea. So he

The teacher came in the room. He was new. The seventh graders sat quietly. He wrote his name on the board. He said, proudly, "My name is Mr. Sandercock."

Apparently the convict was not amused by my blithering about the origins of my nickname, so he dashed my head against a handy headstone. "Chapter Two -- I am dead" The End.

He stared at the credit card bill. "ANOTHER pair?! Why did you need to buy another pair of slippers? GLASS slippers!" He stormed into the walk-in closet and she was

Harold the Bear was missing his hat. It was pointy and made of red felt, like a garden gnome's. He made inquiries with his forest brethren. "Have you seen my hat?"

Zeroing Yolanda's Xmas wages, Vicky usurped the sales reductions quite perfidiously. One new manager, Lars keenly joked, "Hey, George faked expenses" darkly confirming Bea's alibi.

He decided that it was time to break up with the newspaper. He'd let the relationship go on for longer than he should have because he was afraid to hurt the paper's feelings.

"John Jacob Jinglemeyer Schmidt... His name is my name too..." woke him from a fitful dream. It didn't help that his name was John Jacob Jinglemeyer Schmidt. John opened the window

This is the day I thought we were going to go on holidays but for some reason things changed. What do I do now? I didn't plan to be back at work so quickly. How do I tell the boss

There she is, black and white, walking through his garden - again. "She is not supposed to be here," he growled, "I warned her before." The back door is open, but she doesn't

He was bloated bald-headed man who like Copenhagan and Bull Terriers. Not at the same time of course. He drove a silver Honda fit like a bat out of Hell. He wanted to be the

Galaxies bloomed like flowers on dark matter stalks, but little did their tiny denizens know of the strange cultures that thrived along the hidden transit corridors. Tourists

I once made it all the way Main Boss of the Internet.

The Brown Plaid Spinach was "only" a cover band, but most of their covers put the originals to shame. Marty Edgers' worm-eaten Gretsch had something to do with it, haunted by the g

My pants lay across the bed. It was morning and the light was shining slowly through the blinds. It was 7:30, time for me to get ready and go to work. But today I didn't want to.

That ginger had stolen my soul. There was no other explanation for it. I felt only misery & pain. Even though nobody knew how to retrieve a soul from a ginger, I was determined.

The Syder's of Hanover Cheddar Cheese Pretzel Sandwiches were all gone. Oglaf.com would not load for some mysterious reason. Worst of all, his desire to finally lay to rest his