He rubbed his goatee peering at her black leotard over his espresso. She grabbed his beret and flung it. "You just hate me because I want to dig the world always!" Beatniks were

The searchlights passed - it was now or never. "Joe, I can't go out there," Steve said. "I glow in the dark. It was a thing in 2018." Joe glared. "OK, the rest of you - let's go!"

"Titan is like a giant baked Alaska pie". -- Cripes, Jenson's done it again. Get the media handlers on this. The NASA budget's in congressional review & he's gotta pull one of his

I like playing 'let's pretend'.

Scientists have grown a miniature "human brain" the size of a pea, in a feat they hope will

Yo momma is SO fat that when she farted, she was launched into orbit.

I’ve always had an arrogant streak in my nature, so a humbling setback every now and then is probably good for my soul.

He was Satan and he'd totally taken Chthonian glee in making an evil deal with Krispy Kreme donuts that had promised them popularity but

As Roberta drove along, a huge pothole appeared in the road. It wasn't the fear of driving into it, as to what suddenly appeared out of it. A giant

King Arthur said, "Well that certainly is one way to liven up a meeting." Sir Lancelot

I heard a panoply of rattling and hissing coming from my boots. Woody suggested that a snake was the culprit, so when I flipped over my insulated pacs I was surprised to find

I walked along the smouldering ruins of buildings and cars. I noticed a rioter was still trying to steal a fridge. I told him everybody else was gone and the police were coming. He

As I do my dance of love, with my depends hanging low, I should have bought the bigger size, cause this ones almost full, then I step in something squishy, Oh No I've sprung a leak

Make a hot dish, fold up sharply, and milk. Let this serve as an example of why you should never allow pigeons to walk on

Squawkers, everyone's favorite parakeet, hit a dark time in his life when puberty hit. His voice was changing & people would make fun, calling him squeakers. He needed to prove his

I never thought of Gladys as a friend until I found she'd stapled Kim's chiahuahua's ears together just before the Worthlydale Dog Show. The Balinese Dog Dance had to be cancelled!

So I started to leave the room, when Vinnie goes "Does the pope shit in the woods?" and chuckles. I just kept walking. He comes up with weirdest shit after a night of booze and

"Inges Inngh's Inn in IN." "Hello, Helga Helgesen here. Has Helfritz Helgesen had his Hops?

1)tooth paste 2)salt 3)daisies petals

The first day of summer was a couple days ago. That was the day a boy named Brady was born.