Every time I decide to cook I’m always one ingredient short. The last time I tried to make

Slowly he opened the door. They filled the space behind like beans in a can... a can of terror. They watched as he

I was in my room, thinking that if the world im in is just a dream. I recently watched inception and thought that if i try to kill myself i could wake up but knew that this would b

Your bike is in ruins. To investigate the old aviator's limousine, proceed to fold 2. To wash your hands, jump ahead to fold 6. To revisit the badminton court, skip to fold 9.

One day there was a girl named Bernice who was walking down the street. She was walking her dog who had a cone on his head. He had a cone on his head because he had recently been

"You slammed your door on his foot!" "Yes, which proves he was an intruder. I couldn't have crushed it if it wasn't inside my house." "He was selling Girl Scout Cookies." "I don't

There I was in my one piece at the 2013 Muff Dive for the Cure, poised precariously at the end of the board. 100 feet below, a tank of muffs, with a school of muff sharks lazily

I was strolling around the park what a lovely afternoon to take a walk outside and breathe some fresh air. I can't remember the last time I left the office to breathe fresh air I

Gilbert was a very large man but gentle in his stride

Patrick was whining about pizza.

"C'mon Rook" I said to the newest recruit. He looked shellshocked and pale but followed me into the darkened warehouse. An overhead light swung ominously back and forth. I felt

There he was, sitting on top of the pavement in front of the bus stop..

larry is real i am dumb

I love

There was a man named Ted. He lived on a little hill in a little cabin in his little town. One day, he was diagnosed with lung cancer, so he decided to live life to to the fullest.

All our fathers were evil men. Our mothers tell us so in bouts of insurmountable, tear-filled rage. Usually I freeze when I hear the clattering of dishes, but it makes me listen.

Message sent at 20:13 : Hi Jemma, it's Mark ;) call me when you get this x

on nuketown 20 clips of ammo left search and destroy saggin trousers is the only person on his team left while other have 2 out of no where saggin trousers runs of the platform and

I laughed maniacally. He had no idea that he was dealing with a keyboard warrior. Swiftly, I corrected his spelling and grammar, and proceeded to laugh at his poor excuse of a cuss

"OKAY" I could see she was trying not to laugh, "THAT'S WAS GROSS!"