The word CONstitution sounds so negative.

The word CONstitution sounds so negative. Since 'pro' is the opposite of 'con' we should call it prosti..... oh wait…

That hits a little close to home. That explains the hooker I was paying behind the 7-11 who called herself a "Constitute" because her prices were so high.

But the real question, is why do I pay the hooker behind the 7-11? Is it because she's always open? Is it because her pimp is a man in a turban? No. It's because I really need

a return on my investment. I hate putting all my money in slot machines and I know they suck, but it's not like I'm blowing all my money on them. He was constantly questioning

the status quo, but in the end, this sad wretch was a slave to it. Never getting out of his cycle of gambling addiction, always refusing to believe he had a problem so long as he

kept winning. By freak chance he won continuously at black jack, craps, roulette or slots. "I'll stop as soon as I lose", he'd say. In the meantime he had to switch casinos every

week or else they would become suspicious of his incredible luck. But he earned massive amounts of money and didn't want to stop. But, one day, his luck just stopped working.

Supposedly, squid ink was not the cure for cancer and three days later he perished from overdose. The money left over was too much to deal with without a will, so instead they

decided to make things interesting and race for it. A few hours later, they lined up, clad in athletic wear and stretching their joints before the overseeing doctor signalled for

a halt. "Ja, you tested positive for performance-enhancing drugs!" Jolly Dr. Schnellnerbrauten announced with a smile. "You are all disqualified! Dieses Rennen ist vorbei!"