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A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde are stranded

  • A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde are stranded on a deserted island. A magical lamp washed up on the shore and out popped a Genie, "I will grant each one of you one wish!"

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  • The blonde said "I wanna be smart!" The brunette said "I wanna be blonde!" The redhead said "I wanna get the hell off this island!" So - ZAP! The Genie granted their wishes!

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  • Now there were just two blondes on the island, and they realized their mistake. "Oh shoot." They got to work, made fire, a shelter, fish traps, hunted wild pigs. "I like it here,"

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  • said Kate "Screw civilization. Malls, spas & men are overrated." "Then don't join me on the cruise ship that docked here at night & leaves in 5 minutes." "WAIT UP! SCREW COCONUTS!"

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  • Screw Coconuts was miffed because he had shared that story in confidence. Nonetheless, he didn't let it deter him from passing successfully through Customs with the Death Star plan

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  • hidden in his pocket. There was no turning back now. His girlfriend was going to be so mad at him. If he lost his job, he wouldn't be able to take her to the zoo this weekend.

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  • And his girlfriend really loved the Zoo. She'd actually kill him if he didn't take her. He had to do it. His job, not to mention his life, was on the line. "I'll do it," he said.

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  • The lions were waiting. Where monkeys roamed, there were pussywillows. The baboon families famously had their secret stash of pomegranates, unknown to the gorillas. When they were

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  • sleeping, the baboons gathered the luscious fruits and surreptitiously stored them in a cave not far from the gorillas' territory. The baboons laughed among themselves over how

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  • drunk they would get on all that fruit once it fermented, little knowing then that it all would rot and cause their cave to be uninhabitable for anything but fungal spores. Yechh.

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