It was really

It was really

beautiful scenery. As I stood there, I admired the scenery of its beauty. It was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.

What rich grandeur! But something was missing, hmmm... Me! What could intensify this pastoral panorama more than my brilliant smile? Selfie!

were merely three large words that chilled me straight to the bone. The image read "MISSING. PRESUMED DEAD." I felt sick. It was

no rocket science. Soon the police or some nosy detective would be looking for the body, and it was in the trunk of my car. And the keys to the trunk were (most distressing) in my

trunk's key hole-just sticking out of the lock. There was no way I could get away from the crowd and rid my car of the meat bag's body. When the body was found, I'd have no choice

Except to blow up my own car. How to do that? I had to find out as quickly as possible. Things were about to blow up anyway. I wanted to throw up. But I couldn't escape. Argh.

"Wait," I thought, "Throwing up is the key to blowing up my car!" Recalling my cousin's lesson in car repair, I puked acid right where the fuel line should be, under the passenger

seat. At that point the world went blinding white and I could feel myself turning over and over in space. I looked down and spotted the roof of my house getting smaller.