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(Based on a true story) On nights like this,

  • (Based on a true story) On nights like this, my dad would go to the garage, turn on the UV lights, and suck up moths with a vacuum cleaner.
  • One night, my dad found a large nest of moths. Instead of using the vacuum cleaner, he got out a blow torch. "You moths like light?" he said. "You'll get some."
  • Lighting the blow torch, he aimed it at the nest. Fwoomp! The moths caught on fire, and I watched as the burnt bodies littered the ground with ash. "That'll teach them," he said.
  • "When moths are reborn phoenix-style, they take old teachings with them. One life, they'll learn to avoid my torch-enforced no-fly zone." If he couldn't fly, neither would moths.
  • Regardless, you couldn't help but wonder if that was why moths would fling themselves to a fiery death. The chance of rebirth through intense pain was enough for them, but not me.
  • So I stepped away from the edge of Mt. Vesuvius, grateful I had come to my senses before I'd done something silly. I wasn't a virgin anyway. Motha Moth was displeased
  • . The giant moth swirled around the lava spitting caldera. My menstrual emissions confused the pheromone sensors on his great fanlike antennae When Motha Moth plummeted into Vesuvi
  • us I rejoiced and clutched my hands to my bosom. But the Moth emerged from Vesuvius outfitted with armor forged by Vulvan himself. The Moth lowered his battle helmet
  • and did head-butting battle with Vulvan the forger. In a highly suggestive climax, Mt. Vesuvius erupted in a showering display as Moth dealt the last blow. Spent, the two warriors
  • kind of flopped together. Nine months later Vulvavoice emerged fully formed from Vulvan's fiery skull crack in a velvet cocoon which is why penises are drawn to her like moths....
Started
2013-06-24 17:41:45
Finished
2014-03-08 13:01:11

1 Comments

  1. Avatar

    lucielucie Mar 11 2014 @ 17:21

    You had to make your own entertainment in the 20th century.

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