For George, the rehearsal just felt... off.

For George, the rehearsal just felt... off. He approached the lead actress hesitantly. "Um, this is Les Miserables, right?" "Uh, no, dude. This is Miserable Lesbians." She looked a

bit like Angela Merkel. "Miserable Lesbians," George repeated. "Is that Ibsen? The lead actress glared at him. "Nein." The female cast surrounded him, their arms crossed. George

consulted his script. "I'd love to chat," he said, "but I've got to go & hang myself in the woodshed." 'Miserable Lesbians' was a triumph! Frau Krautchen & George won glittering

awards for their "edgy" and "blase" approach to the homosexual identity on Broadway. Krautchen had always had an incredible talent for screenplays, but this was George's first go

ng bath. George had never laid on the floor and let a towel wasted man with dreads hit a giant gong next to his head so that the vibrations would cleanse his chakra. Krautchen thou

young Youth, beneath cerulean skies, your arms all akimbo and your love lost to the Time Lords again. High thee to a Chanoyu, for the Shogun comes for you. You best not avoid him.

The shogunates were aggressive but short lived. Chanoyu was thankful for this happening each time the sun went quiescent. He was crowned emperor almost four years later. By then,

the previous emporer had run the whole damned country into the toilet. But Chanoyu knew that if he ruled with an iron fist and a lead foot, he could put it into overdrive. Soon he

began to infuse his evening tea with silver and he rubbed his nipples with cinnabar just before the full moon. Chanoyu knew the country must be governed subtly and auspiciously, or

The ghost of Bin Laden would tickle his privates with his beard once more. Fed up with the shittiness of the universe, he decided to become a ticket warden. Nobody was surprised.