Lord Samuel of Goldwood let out a loud belch.

Lord Samuel of Goldwood let out a loud belch. Sir Matt Fornicot blushed. King Smith XI rose and boomed "HOW DARETH THEE BURP IN MY ROYAL PRESENCE?!".

"Alright children, recess is over!" Yelled a teacher, as all the kids returned to their respective classrooms. They would finish playing their game later.

But little Timmy didn't think of adding, noun finding and shape coloring as amusing, not one bit. So halfway through music class, glass shattering came with a loud ding and a weep.

The music teacher recorded a sample of the unique noises produced by little Timmy and suggested to the class they produce an alternate song for the radio station competition

She decided that they would be better suited for a classical soundtrack, taking Timmy's vocals and using them as a violin. The other children soon joined in.

Once they were almost filled all the way to the top of the bin, David Miscavige, owner of Hollywood, switched on the blender. Liquefy. Children screamed, but not for long. The

slurry that resulted was then funnelled into Stepford Children machine. Which, using proprietary & illegal gene splicing techniques, turned the slurry of children into obedient and

soulless little child-shaped bags of slurry. "Look at how the school system has succeeded!" crowed the superintendent. "My little Remington has never been so nice!" exclaimed Mrs.

Evilwoman, who took pride in her status as a "vampire" who sucked happiness out from children. As the school continued to operate, children continued to be turning into husks, and

their souls were slowly but surely drained of their life force. Gaunt and harrowing, it's no wonder people mistook the school for a mental asylum. The vampire remained youthful.