Arrrrgh, how could he be so God Damn selfish!
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Arrrrgh, how could he be so God Damn selfish! Didn't he know that its not in a woman's nature to be kept waiting, or was it part of his master plan? Either way
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, the Scrabble hourglass had run out ten minutes ago. "Cool it, babe," he said. "I'm trying to get a triple word score with a "Q", a "Z", and two "F"'s. Do you have a dictionary?"
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"No, but I know that if you were Dorothy, you'd be dead by now, cuz I ain't bailing you out of this one!"
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"I guess I will die alone with Toto at my side, eating my scraps to survive.
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Oh Toto, if only we'd followed the Glindas advice and stayed on the yellow brick road." Toto couldn't wait 'til I was dead & started gnawing my ankles. Fortunately the Tin woodsman
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had been filled with cement. That way when Toto and I pushed him in the lake, he'd sink. Next, Toto and I should off that stupid lion. I bought a woodchipper from a flying
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monkey named Mortimer and directed my cadre of na'er-do-well munchkins to forcibly escort the wrapped lion into the chipper. He was cowardly to the end. I dusted my hands and Toto
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kicked one of the winged monkeys in the nuts. The wicked witch was standing o the corner, lipstick smeared raggedly across her thin lips. Sun-bleached needlemarks on her arm stood
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as a testament the Wizard's poppies did not delude her. But the witch's sanity was broken much as ours. The lion turned savage, the scarecrow tearing himself apart. Tinman froze. I
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I looked into the distance, and saw a munchkin,Toto and a flying monkey (who was wearing my ruby slippers) climb into the hotair balloon &fly away. Never could stand that dog.
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- Started
- 2011-07-27 15:32:11
- Finished
- 2012-10-14 15:58:01
4 Comments
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CrazyBananas Oct 14 2012 @ 15:59
Thank you, Tom Waits, for the inspiration on the closing......
Zetawilk Oct 14 2012 @ 16:02
In the words of the Tinman SciFi miniseries (SyFy is an excuse for them to show professional wrestling), as bespoken by the wicked witch, "Fly, my cleavage monkeys, fly!"
SlimWhitman Oct 14 2012 @ 16:16
Glinda: "Thou shalt click the ruby slippers together three times. No more, no less. Three shalt be the number of times thou shalt click them together and the number shalt be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number be reached, then thou shalt return to Antioz." Dorothy: "Antioch?" Glinda: "No Antioz my Dear, spelled with a Q, a Z and two F's. It is a place fully of poppies and rabid little doggies, and wood chippers. Once you're there. You'll never want to leave. Trust me."
49erFaithful Oct 14 2012 @ 17:20
Beware the rabbits of Antioz. They're killer.