I once bought a Wendy's Kids Meal. The toy

I once bought a Wendy's Kids Meal. The toy that came with it was a mini plastic model of a McDonald's Happy Meal. The toy that came with the mini McDonald's Happy Meal was

a small lego house. Inside the house was picture of Empire State Building. Standing on the observation deck was a kid with a Star Wars lunch box. Inside the lunchbox was

chew through the plastic and escape underground, where he would slowly absorb the dark energies of B'chugerroth, the shadowy lord of black intentions.

Unfortunately, he had chosen to wear a matching fluorescent polka dot suit, which just does not go with black, and so untold dark power turned it's nose up at him.

He was out of Goth Club. Yet another reason to be miserable. "If I can't fit in here, will I ever fit in?" he said to himself as he washed away his black eyeliner. Then he realised

that the true spirit of Goth was inside him all along. He didn't need the mascara, the black leather or the spiked collar. Why did he need these outer trappings, if his heart was

as black and as withered as the tree in his back yard that had been struck by lightning on his 17th birthday. He began sobbing loudly, striking his skull with his clenched fists,

in an effort to cause a self-induced brain injury that would make him forget the tragedy. Blood trickled down his forehead as his fists continued pounding. Soon he passed out and

slid to the floor. When he awoke from his coma, 28 years later, the memory was still fresh and vivid. He could forgive but would never forget. And so we are all doomed.