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Joshua refused to take the FCAT test. Even

  • Joshua refused to take the FCAT test. Even at the age of three he knew that verbiage was a tool of distortion and control. He looked through the people of earth and of other worlds
  • well actually, he merely looked at photos on the internet. Joshua refused to take a lot of tests on high-minded grounds, but really, he just knew he would fail because he hated stu
  • dying of any kind. All he wanted to do was play video games and watch the internet porn and Joshua eventually refused to set foot outside of his basement for fear of inadvertently
  • starting an intergalactic war that could not be halted with mere Millenium ID Glide. Sure, it is tasteless, removes make-up, and is a hair de-frizz in a pinch, but
  • it was mankind's only hope against the alien armada. They had high-phase lasers and we had gel cream and popsicles. But humans were the only ones who had these things.
  • Which turned out to refract the aliens high-phase lasers into small holographic replicas of Elvis. The rest of the galaxy capitulated where as the earthlings unwittingly worshipped
  • at the altar of trans fats. The Empire of Elvis sent hounddog class space ships to Heartbreak Hotel, the alien space station on the dark side of the moon. The invasion of Earth was
  • next. Parachuting down from the mothership, thousands of Elvis aliens entered a glittering city known by earthlings as "Vegas." The earthling barely noticed, as they were busy
  • being disco clowns, complete with white face paint, big red rubber noses, rainbow wigs and enormous shoes. The Elvis aliens really had no idea what to make of this bizarre display
  • so everybody just got down & went crazy dancing & honking & jiggling & squirting seltzer water everywhere. Ah huh huh HOOTY hooty hoo! Alien Elvis disco clowns. Who'da thunk it?
Started
2012-05-29 23:10:07
Finished
2013-05-11 00:00:49

1 Comments

  1. Avatar

    KieferSkunk May 11 2013 @ 00:13

    You got epic space battles, Elvis, aliens, disco and clowns! What's not to like!? :)

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