The shortest novel in the world began: Once

The shortest novel in the world began: Once

upon a time in a galaxy far far away Lived an old nun who really to masticate some buffalo wings. mmm... SO good. Yet her problem was her contract clearly stated no chicken and so

she ate bufflow wings because she thought they wernt chicken she a masticaed like no other

gorilla at the zoo. She sharpened her teeth on the bones. The next time that stupid intern came in to clean her "Cell" she would rip her spine out like pulling down a zipper. She

She waited patiently, day after day, growing first dehydrated, then desiccated, then to dust, hatred building even after death. Her zookeeper was long dead, but gorilla revenge

she maintained was a dish best served cold, and the way the ambush had been staged, followed by a lethal blow to the head with her dinner of under-ripe bananas, was reminiscent of

about the vampires who kept knocking at his igloo. "Can we come in? it's cold out here." and he would reply "Nope." "But we made a lovely gift basket." "Invite only, Scram."

They didn't reply, which made him nervous. He turned off his tiny camping lantern and let his eyes adjust to the glow of starlight outside the ice bricks which cast shadows of the

swarms of locusts quickly moving toward him. Before he could scream they had filled up his nose and mouth, moving around in a delicious mix of locust flavor, the kind they kill for