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"To be successful...." Thus started my speech.

  • "To be successful...." Thus started my speech. It was pretty much the same opening each time. And they bought it. Can you believe that? What if they find out I really
  • have no freaking idea what "success" is. The only thing I've ever succeeded at was failure...oh, and motivational speaking. Sure, I could get an audience all fired up,
  • But then they'd trash the place. I had difficulties booking venues for my motivational talk: 'Be the BEST. Buy more STUFF. Have more SEX.' So I wrote a best selling book 'The 24 ha
  • ppiest People Alive!' It was utter poppycock, but...nobody cared to check if the personalities I illuminated even existed (which they didn't) but everyone so wanted to believe...
  • For example, Fyodor Menchnikov von Borschtenzloty, the inventor of a method to prepare alcoholic beverages in hard time by distilling glue through a breadloaf.
  • These are the things a gulag is good for. The frost bite on my fingers were my calendar now. Judging by my blackened ring finger, it had been 13 years. Even here, the older you get
  • the more becomes clear. I would sip my gulag "fish broth" and ponder the marks of the Novgorod birch bark I was arrested for. One of Arkadiy's chest tatts burned my mind even more:
  • Vladimir Gorodov visited and put a salve on my chest, which cured me of any more need for self-bifurcation. My chest hair grew back as tree branches my shirt couldn't cover up.
  • From these branches grew peaches that I gave to the starving children of the neighborhood. Vladimir Gorodov offered to put salve on my back, but I declined his offer. There were
  • no better times worth living in. The peaches were ripe, the children were happy, and Vlad had a full pouch of salve. We all walked away happy that day.
Started
2013-03-26 17:51:29
Finished
2016-08-03 14:24:36

8 Comments

  1. Avatar

    Woab Aug 03 2016 @ 14:29

    Isn't this what success is really all about?
  2. Avatar

    PurpleProf Aug 03 2016 @ 14:36

    Truly, there is nothing better than a full pouch of salve. LOL!
  3. Avatar

    Gdnknxprmnt Aug 03 2016 @ 14:38

    Thanks! =D @PurpleProf
  4. Avatar

    SlimWhitman Aug 03 2016 @ 17:32

    Successful foldingstories like this leave a smile on my face and peaches on my chest.
  5. Avatar

    Woab Aug 03 2016 @ 17:34

    Yes, well, I was trying not to stare at those, Slim.
  6. Avatar

    BlastedHeath Aug 06 2016 @ 16:04

    I'm really glad that Woab and Gdnknxprmnt have joined us, as they both seem to bring some special sauce.
  7. Avatar

    Woab Aug 06 2016 @ 18:27

    Gee thanks, BH! You're a peach!
  8. Avatar

    Gdnknxprmnt Aug 08 2016 @ 11:16

    Thank you sir, I make all the sauce in house.

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