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This one time, in band camp

  • This one time, in band camp
  • I stuck a flute up my
  • tail pipe of my 1965 Mustang. Now, when I revved up the engine, I got a piercing whistle that would awake the neighborhood.
  • I gunned it in front of my girlfriends house to impress her but the muffler whistle hit a tone that shattered all their windows. Her dad, local Prez of the NRA was not amused
  • because his prize "crystal" gun case shattered too. He grabbed his Purdey Side-by-Side Game Gun and shot my car. But my car
  • was a Transformer. I never knew. And it didn't like being shot. It turned into some kinda weird pudding robot & yelled at the mugger, then shot him in the nuts. "Don't shoot stuff!
  • Or I'll tell mommy!" yelled the little girl in pigtails from atop an adjacent building. I hadn't seen her at all - she must have been watching the entire time. With a sigh I began
  • To lace up my roller skates, and pull up my striped knee socks. I was looking good, hair was feathered, short-shorts fit just right. I skated onto the floor, slipped onto the orang
  • -utan, and then did a triple lutz and a somersault before flying face-first into the DJ booth. The judges held up their signs (I got a 9.3), and the orangutan pressed charges.
  • However, the cops recognized and arrested the orangutan as the notorious "Baby Doll Smuggler" known to sneak Barbie dolls into Iran, where they are banned. Yea, I was freed!!!

1 Comments

  1. KieferSkunk Sep 27 2012 @ 12:58

    Never slip onto an orangutan Barbie smuggler. You never know whose car might turn out to be a transformer.

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