Herbert was relaxing on the patio on a warm

Herbert was relaxing on the patio on a warm July evening, enjoying his gin & tonic, when suddenly the stones beneath him gave way and he found himself plunging, still in his chair

yoga "downward good dog" pose that he'd learned from a Barnes and Noble gift book, he was so relaxed that when he finally crashed at the bottom he survived, but where in the

hell did he mean to go in the first place? Too bad all the bookstores are gone now. Can't find a book in any of the malls. Didn't expect that change so soon. Not in 2011 at least.

I tried to explain to the denizens at the food court what a 'book' was. "It's like a blog except it is on pieces of pulped wood." They stared blankly. "Where's the scroll bar?"

"What if it freezes up? How do you charge it?" And on and on and on. I said "Look you knuckleheaded dimwits, it's a book. You open it up and read the words on the pages."

I demonstrated,letting the censored book open to my favorite passage, the yellowed, dog-eared page caught their curiosity. "Dude, we'll get caught! This is prereader technology! "

"Excuuuuuuse me, princess! I know what the hell I'm doing!" Darwin shut his mouth as I scanned the page I had opened the book up to. It described in detail the process of

gaining the ability to talk to animals, it was really cool, but totally secret. Debbie laughed at the specificity of that passage before shutting the book and dragging Darwin outsi

claimed she wasn't related to the New Yor Giants' Antrel Rolle, but the man in the straight jacket knew better.