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Beaver one, beaver all; Let's all do the

  • Beaver one, beaver all; Let's all do the beaver crawl. Beaver two, beaver three; let's all climb the beaver tree. Beaver four, beaver five; let's all do the beaver jive. Beaver s

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  • ix, Beaver seven, let's all go to beaver heaven. [from back of class] "heh, heh, heh, heh, heh, he said Beaver." "Yeah, beaver is cool." "Shut up Beavis, they're talking about

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  • gnawing on wood, this is serious." Beavis shuddered. "Hey, Butthead, you think all beavers have teeth? For real though, this is pertinent information. Some beavers and I were gonna

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  • sit around & chuckle at bad music. Then a toon cat & dog were going to do mega-violent bathroom humor." Bevis' stuttering entertained the 80s generation of spoiled, homophobic kids

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  • . I was glad I was raised in the 70s, when kids who grew up with Scooby-Do were cool. But right now, Bevis was gonna need some help getting away from the 80's kids, so I

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  • Did some research at the library. One floor led to another until I found myself not on the 9th floor but on the first. Following the stairs was the way to get what I needed.

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  • I realized then the library was a mystery spot like the one in Santa Cruz or like the Bermuda Triangle, a tesseract of book shelves & spiralling stairs. I was trapped until I found

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  • a handwritten inscription on the wall left by another lost visitor. It was dated 1887. Not good. As 2 days had passed, I decided to ignore the rules and yelled: LIBRARIAN, HELP ME!

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  • I couldn't find the rest of the inscriptions in the library. The most recent one I could find was dated 1892 and I wasn't about to find the next one quickly. The librarian came

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  • to tell me that the library would be closing in 15 minutes. I explained that the fate of the world depended on my finding that last inscription. The librarian threw me out.

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