My story's character is sitting on the top

My story's character is sitting on the top deck of a bus going through Knightsbridge. I'd like to tell you more but my character is refusing all contact with me, won't return calls

and is generally acting like a total ingrate. I've tried everything! He seems to have his phone off and is kneeling on the open top of the omnibus, eyes close and a gentle mumbling

Katy Perry lyrics. What he doesn't know is that this omnibus is actually taking him South instead of North. This ungrateful sack of you know what will have a rude awakening when

Three years later, the truth comes out. He ended up in Galagoland, abandonned. He foraged and ate bugs, until he was rescued by Katy Perry herself. "You eat bugs? Gross!", she said

and then buried his head in her ample bosom. Thom Yorke was walking by nibbling on pork rind when he saw a bug eating wastrel with his head buried in Katy Perry's tits. It was jaun

diced and most likely a programmer for EA Games, trying to barter another Sweet Treats expansion pack from her for Sims 4. Thom Yorke puked in his bag of pork rinds. What a party!

The next thing we knew, police were pouring in from every window and doorway, calling us names and confiscating our game boys. Oh yes, and hitting us with billy clubs. Randy jumped

at a lean officer with dark hair, and they hit him so hard his eyes rolled back. I knew right then that coming had been a mistake. I crouched behind a coffee table and tried to

draw a bead on the perps. I knew only after I pulled the trigger and the “BANG!” flag dropped from the barrel that I had the wrong gun. The perps stopped beating the officer and

and took out their own BANG! guns, the little red flags merrily flapping as our haphazard shadows jousted in the trashcanlight. I wasn’t sure whose side I was on. The cop groaned.