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"Put the shit in the box or I'm gonna carve

  • "Put the shit in the box or I'm gonna carve up your stuff"

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  • "Ok, please just calm down. Let's be reasonable here."

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  • Maybe we went about this whole situation wrong, hell - maybe everybody did. All I know is I've never connected with another human emotionally like i did with that hamster.

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  • Snuggles could sense when I was anxious, and the way he calmly nibbled his hamster nuggets would always soothe me.

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  • Snuggles could stare into my soul with his onyx nocturnal eyes. I told my therapist about my hamster love in all its glory. Sighing, he looked down his nose and said,

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  • "You're obviously substituting your furry friend for real, human relationship in all its messiness. I think you might be afraid to risk yourself again. This week, I want you to

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  • approach a stranger on the street and ask talk with them for at least 5 minutes. That way you can get used to human contact again."

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  • I was skeptical about this proposal, but I decided to try it out. I approached the nearest stranger--a man whose face appeared to have been melted off in a very recent fire. I

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  • lit a swan vesta directly from his cheek bone, blew a perfect smoke ring and gave the answer to his proposal directly to his face. He smiled, raised a charred eyebrow and said

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  • “the monkey is not for sale” and brought up his knee to crush the man’s scrotum. Grabbing the keys to the Viper, he sprinted out the door–Diablilo in tow- to live another day.

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