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Dear Santa, How are you? How is your wife?

  • Dear Santa, How are you? How is your wife? I'd like to explain that little incident at Charlie's place.
  • You see, I didn't do it on purpose! I really didn't. That jerk shouldn't have messed with my hair in the first place. Please don't go to his house. Anyways dearest Santa, this year
  • I want that new MangoGinsengMintYak'sMilk shampoo that's on TV, and a pedicure please. Oh, and-" Santa stopped reading, Lord give me strength, he thought, why do I do this again?
  • Santa let the list drop to the ground. He was too fat and too old for this anymore. When he'd started out, there wasn't that much stuff to deliver. Wood blocks, a stick. Now it see
  • ms understandable why he & Mrs Claus never had any children of their own. Mrs Claus had asked many times about adopting an unwanted Chinese girl but Santa said the Chinese don't
  • recognize adoption applications from the North Pole. Santa made that up. He'd managed to keep secret all these years even from his wife that he hated children, but the job payed
  • So well he could drink deaths door vodka the rest of the year.
  • Which he did.
  • But did he really do it? Did there exist a "he" which could do the doing, or was "he" merely a bundle of neurons firing in tandem that produced as an effect his course of action?
  • Details! In the end it was proven that it was not he, but she that had done it. But by that time she had started a new life in a foreign country under the name of Wumba-Wumba.
Started
2012-12-12 17:28:09
Finished
2016-07-17 16:04:46

4 Comments

  1. Avatar

    SlimWhitman Jul 17 2016 @ 17:10

    So is Santa Real? Or is he just a bundle of eight tiny neurons firing in tandem in children's brains? Or is he a Death's Vodka fume induced hallucination? Is he a she? The very same Wumba Wumba who delivers tiny mouse skulls to reed pouches of children of the tribe of Wugaga Rudofugu when they've been bad? Stay tune for the resolution of these and many other mysteries in .... da du da du da du da deedle deleet! The Folding Zone!
  2. Avatar

    Woab Jul 18 2016 @ 10:36

    Dear Slim: The answer to all your questions is yes. It may not be the right answer, but it's the only one we have, so we might as well deal with it. Love, Woab
  3. Avatar

    PurpleProf Jul 18 2016 @ 21:20

    Ha! I like Woab' s ending!
  4. Avatar

    Woab Jul 19 2016 @ 12:28

    ...and I like the Prof's beginning!

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