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Once upon a time, there was a man named Ron.

  • Once upon a time, there was a man named Ron. Ron was an elderly man who has lived an exceptional life. He filled his early years of living with extreme adventures.
  • One day, Ron decided to build a "Bucket List" of things he would like to accomplish before he died. The first item on his list was
  • writing a bucket list. He checked that one off right away. The second was writing the great American novel in short sentences at 3 minute intervals. The third item on his list was
  • to create a Great American Character called Mungo P. Talleyrand. 4th was to write the great British novel featuring a character called Peter Piper & a plot twist involving pickled
  • camels testicles. When the book was published the literary press was shocked and outraged at the breaking of such a taboo subject as camel balls. Camel rights activists were
  • basically the bottom of the barrel for animal activists. They were right under Slug Rights activists. Camel Rights activists burnt down a 7-11 to produce using camels on cigarettes
  • & they're wicked mean on a nicotine fit. You seen the Camel Rights activists let the ends justify the means in their crusade. They road into the 7-11 on their withdrawing dromoderi
  • es, smashing & burning everything designed by The Man to keep camels down. Burritos, Pepsi, candy bars. Hypocritically, everything except Camel cigarettes, which the camels smoked.
  • "It's not like we were cannibals," one of the camels explained during an interview with Oprah, "they're cigarettes." Then, behind the scenes video showed a single act of brutality
  • as one camel lit a cigarette in the hooves of another. The shrieking went on for hours. "Explain this," Oprah demanded. The camel shrugged. "Just getting rid of some camel toe."

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