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I know I'm just a robot, a metal man. But

  • I know I'm just a robot, a metal man. But I love you. I love you more than your parents ever will. Could you please
  • escape your miserable little life and come join me in a voyage across the seas, and I'll promise to make you a real woman. Hope you don't mind being seen dating a robot, but
  • I wanted to show you off. It's not everyday we cone across sentient plants with locomotive abilities. My Robotic friends don't believe me so I must bring proof. You'll be woman in
  • comfortable shoes just as soon as you let me administer this warmed, fragrant oil to your mons venus because now is the magic time where no judgments
  • of "guilty" are being found against our relationship. And by "magic time", I mean I handsomely bribed every justice within five hundred miles. Then, sweetie, allow me to touch your
  • gavel the way we used to. Oh, baby, that's the way justice is in the big city. You can't just throw a handful of pork rinds at the problem and expect me to skedaddle, do you, honey
  • No, you need the entire PIG. And that's exactly what we did - we went down to Mr. O'Malley's Farmhouse and rounded up his swine, throwing them at buildings like meat footballs. The
  • Mattel board meeting went silent. "That's your pitch? Peg-A-Pig?" They hated it, and Tom knew what this meant. To the Molasses Swamp with him. "BUT THAT'S HASBRO!" He said, sinking
  • "We must concur Hasbro!" Said the president of Mattel.
  • Sadly, they were both crushed by Japanese toy manufacturer Bandai, after it released Belching Coin Munching Face Bank and Road Kill Cat.

3 Comments

  1. Bad. May 05 2012 @ 12:06

    It's scary...how great of a product that is!

  2. DanMars May 05 2012 @ 12:25

    Japanese products never cease to disgust/amaze me!

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