Joe Fallows lingered in bed, reflecting on

  • Joe Fallows lingered in bed, reflecting on his dreams of the past few nights. Just the fact that he was dreaming again after months of drought made him happy. Finally he got up and
  • looked in the mirror, making sure that he wasn't dead, dreaming, or have some other weird disease that had caused him to dream up bits and pieces of a solution. He could remember
  • a sequence of events in which he had successfully completed a task, and was proud of that accomplishment. There was still the lingering feeling of pride but, the task had vanished
  • from the screen. He felt in his pocket for more tokens...empty! Blast it! Why didn't his mom give him more tokens! He hated her and he hasted this stupid chuck.e.cheese! He went
  • on a violent rampage, clocking passersby with a Whack-A-Mole mallet as he ricocheted clumsily through the crowds toward the exit. Slipping on a jumbo pizza, he crashed through
  • the table where Dougie had just placed Spam Baby, sending wood and canned meat shrapnel everywhere. Stanley became pinned to the floor choking on spam. Maybe chopped liver
  • felt this way, Stan thought lying their with his entrails displayed. He heard a scraping sound & his eyes widened with horror as he recognized the mauled Spam Baby inching toward
  • him in a roller skate with no wheels.Stan knocked Spam Baby from the skate with his hammertoe,used the laces to bind up his exposed entrails&lurched toward the dumbwaiter.Spam Baby
  • 's head was lopped off in the dumb waiter. It bounced down into the kitchen. The chef was Hawaiian and knew exactly what to do with Spam Baby's head, so he
  • set the oven at 425°F, placed pineapple rings on the eyes and added bean sprouts to the top. It was a great success and won 1st place at Hormel's Spamboree 2012 in Austin, MN.


  1. m80 Dec 28 2011 @ 18:54

    But of course the Spamboree would be in Austin MN! http://www.spam.com/games/museum/

  2. Chaz Dec 28 2011 @ 23:13

    I did go to the Spamboree in the 90s. Small town carnival meets canned meat and PETA protester dressed as pig. Bought the t-shirt.

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