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I should've realized something was up when

  • I should've realized something was up when they asked me to sign the contract in blood.

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  • But due to my innocent nature I signed in blood & was the proud new owner of a pair of baby demons. They loved living with me & found teething on my sofa and fine china a ball. But

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  • even baby demons grow up, & it was time to enrol the pair at Floot's Preparatory. To get in, though, they would need to impress the headmaster, Mr. Spankton. "Polish your horns!" I

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  • coughed and whispered under my breath. "That's what she said." The headmaster took no notice. I glanced at my schedule. Next class was Demonic Possession 101.

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  • I decided to skip class, since possession was not of my interest. Instead I hit Home and House Decor and Design, where I met up with Bill the Boy and we set about making our

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  • giant eiffel tower

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  • , not the little teensy Eiffel Tower full of cheap perfume that sat on my dressing table to remind me of our honeymoon in Paris. Jacques had bought it in a drug store and I had

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  • Been intrigued by the year round holiday displays. Every day was Bastille Day! On the Place de L'Opera, we ate at Le Deuxieme Etappe. A fortune teller showed up and offered to do

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  • Stand Up Mime at our enemies for a price. I have to admit that I seriously considered her offer but ultimately passed on it. I had too much a history with my adenoids to ever give

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  • her what she truly wanted. I then decided to become an exotic dancer as it had always been my dream. I was oily, covered in sparkles and happy forever. The End

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