Imagine my surprise when the jaguar tattooed

Imagine my surprise when the jaguar tattooed on my bicep looked up at me and roared. Hacking bits of phlegm onto the sawdust floor, Earl turned off his tattoo machine and peered

at the inky jag. Its deep red eyes followed his every move. When Earl tried to step away from the tattoo machine, the big cat on my arm growled, "Don't stop, I still need a body!"

I was surprised by it´s sudden outbreak, he needed a body but I wanted my own freedom to decide what I carried on my body.

& so I decided to carry a wobbly tower of carelessly stacked out-of-date Hungarian woodglue tubes precariously balanced on each shoulder. I thought I was IT. Little did I know that

the heights you'd reached towering above your significantly more pimpled peers. I should have followed Stumpy's advice."Never spit on a perfectly good pair of

freckles. Because, as everyone knows, freckles are very rare indeed.

But not as rare as a geckle. You've never seen a geckle? That's why they're so rare! You have to be in the woods to even have a chance of finding yourself your very own geckle.

And since you can't see the forest for the trees, I don't know how you're going to find the geckle. Don't look now, but I think I can see it sneaking up behind you! Hold still

or else.." She trailed off as it was too late. The geckle had crawled into his ear to shut him off from the inside. There was one final twinkle in his eye before he disintegrated.