You stroll into a dark alley on the corner

You stroll into a dark alley on the corner of Madison and Filly. Suddenly a shadow passes by. You hide behind the pungent trash bin. You can't believe you eyes! It's

Mrs. McGillycutty, your 4th grade teacher-crush! If you walk up to her and say "Hi, wanna get a drink?" continue to Fold 3. If you keep hiding until she leaves, skip to Fold 10.

Ah, I see you were brave for a lad so young. If your teacher Mrs. McGillucutty orders a carton of milk, ignore this fold. But if she orders a chocolate martini, proceed to Fold 4.

What a surprise. Mrs. McGillucutty got a chocolate martini. After wading through a spitball sodden schoolroom to teach a brat like you who can blame her? In Fold 5 her brown lips

fall from her face and squirm across the floor like conjoined earthworms. Mrs. McGillicutty tries to capture her escaped lips, but stumbles, drunk from choco-tinis, and in Fold 6

She gets even more of her favourite chocolates, the Brown Bombers. That's when the action really starts! She sneezes 10 times in Fold 5, so loud it wakes her husband up.

"Where am I," asked her husband. "Beside me in bed," she answered. "Oh, okay, but who is that on top of you?" "That's you also now go to sleep," she said and put a pillow over his

head, shoving him away. Just six more months, she thought. It wasn't her idea to get a husband with Alzheimer's this advanced, and with a body this crinkled, no matter how rich.

But when she looked into his big, vacant eyes she thought she detected a glimmer of love for her still within them, and that kept her going. She was, of course, wrong, but

it wouldn't be the first time she fell for someone who was using, or dead or possessed by aliens or mounted on a wall. It just felt safer being with a person she could easily mace.