16

These two join Bert & Ernie and Peppermint

  • These two join Bert & Ernie and Peppermint Patty & Marcie in my childhood pantheon of same-sex couples. They are

    2
  • not allowed the same rights and benefits afforded to Charlie Brown and Lucie, or Kermit and Ms. Piggy. Snuffleupagus and Big Bird were platonic friends, except for one night in

    2
  • that cabin at Lake Waputadetumadrepincheiwacamaw. The listened to aspirational podcasts and practiced Nuero-linguistic Programming modes on each other. Snuffleupagus took Big Bird

    1
  • over the river and through the woods to Sesame Street Forest to grandmothers house where they met Oscar the grouch in his garbage can. Grandmother had just baked a fresh

    2
  • meat pie and Oscar was having trouble not going crazy and devouring it before the party people came. Then the wolf arrived and everyone stood still, because he had a very

    2
  • low tolerance for anyone that moved. The wolf padded quietly to the meat pie, devoured it and washed it down with water he drank straight from the toilet while the party crowd ran

    1
  • The Kentucky Derby day bets and won thousands some three years later. The wolf ate everything and walked out the back door unnoticed. The party crowd was too drunk to know that the

    1
  • best ors'deurves had been scarfed by the departed lupine. The partygoers were already at the part where they were starting to puke down their own shirts. Down on the track the wolf

    2
  • was chasing the electric rabbit, while the stupefied greyhounds could only watch. The wolf was gaining on the rabbit and had nearly caught it when a nauseated partygoer aimed a

    2
  • seltzer bottle the wrong way and sprayed the electric rabbits. Sparks flew and the wolf caught fire. The greyhounds shouted, "Duck & Roll!" The wolf didn't understand and he died.

    1

2 Comments

  1. Col.Lingus Dec 04 2020 @ 02:09

    He be dead.

  2. Woab Dec 05 2020 @ 13:26

    ...and burned.

Want to leave a comment?

Sign up!