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In all my years, I don't recall any good

  • In all my years, I don't recall any good thing ever happening to me. I sold all of my happy memories for an express flight back to Earth. It wasn't easy. The blue-skinned girl said
  • there was one memory hidden so deep that the pincers on her psychic tweezers hadn't had the purchase to extract it. I had to give her an IOU note for it & promise to hand it over
  • to Roberto, the local welder. He was into this psychedelic mind crap. Extracting stuff was
  • what he did best. His trusty extractor tools always at the ready, he extracted flywheels, bearings, chainlinks & break pads. Roberto the Welder expanded to extract teeth, blackhead
  • s, navel lint and earwax lumps, but he still wasn't satisfied. Roberto thought long about his extractor tools and pondered if there wasn't a way to refine them into something that
  • could construct a delicate assembly of rods & wires, a multi-purpose contraption that could not only capture the imagination of the unwashed masses but also serve to depilate their
  • beards. Now they're clean thanks to Boeing and their contraption. "That'll be none hundred dollars
  • , uh, I mean ONE hundred dollars. No, no. FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS! We take our beard cleaning business very seriously, ahem." Boeing rubbed his fingers together, but I didn't have
  • the heart to tell him that the beard cleaning business had already been acquired by Trump Enterprises in a hostile take over. I would let Boeing go on believing that he
  • was the king of beard cleaning. What harm could it do now? And so poor Boeing slipped away, a smile on his face. "I finally beat that chump Trump," were his last words.

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