I find myself laying upon the dusty remnants

I find myself laying upon the dusty remnants of what was once mine. I can feel the quakes of an incoming C5 Space Cruiser as it prepares to refuel before final combustion. I was

slowly growing hungryfor beef jerkey. I grabbed my sword, and went in search of some pigs in the woods out back. To my avail, I only found some bees that stung the hell out of me.

domain, and I am the master of my domain. I said to the bees, "Your attempt at punnery really bugs me." They said, "Your puns have lost their sting." I said, "Hive you lost your mi

mind eraser?" I left the bees feeling chipier than Alvin or his friends. I stopped in the diner for lunch and ran into Stu. Are you having stew, Stu? He didn't look up, but I

knew that he was silently cursing me. It's the joke about the names. As a man named Harry I know all about

having my named made fun of, but I would never bring my parents to court over it, like my bully-of-a-brother, Sue, did. He was looking into taking away everything Mom and Dad had.

Sue's always been a greedy boy. When he was little he'd always use his deceptively innocent babyface to get more pocket money. Our parents' cars are practically his; now he's after

all the oil in the Emirates. And he'll get it too - one look at those dimples and those baby blues and emirs will be signing over oil wells left and right. That's why I hate him.

See? I admitted it-happy now? I'm jealous of him. Jealous of his beauty. I just want to be perfect, too, so I don't have to work hard to get anything in life.