An orc and an elf, imagine that. I never
- An orc and an elf, imagine that. I never thought my son would ever get out of these mines, let alone find such a pretty thing to marry. An adventurer... who ever heard of that from
- Stubville, Wisconsin. But here he was, the adventurer, ready to enter Iron Mountain and seek his fortune under the nesting Jade Dragon.
- He did a quick inventory. Righteous vengeance? Check. Full armory of weapons? Check. Map of Iron Mountain? Check. Baby loaf of extra sharp cheddar? Check. He entered the mountain
- fortress coordinates into his GPS & hiked up the slope. Angband was as a toxic super site since Smog settled there so he also wore a Greenpeace suit. His dragon piercing harpoongun
- was firmly packed into his thong, and reinforced with discarded dragon scales - a natural flame retardant. His vibram's matched and he felt quite confident scaling the wall
- , but then he fell down. "Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!" The dragon scales rubbed him just the wrong way. "Now I'm all itchy! And my knee hurts! Waaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!"
- Now this was a man who some might call a crybaby, a hypochondriac and a whiner. But despite his allergies and sensitivity to dragon-scale scraping, this brave man endured so that
- in the 25th century he was still autographing the latest instalment of his autobiography, 'Another hundred years, another hundred beatings to my eggy heart.' The only dragon
- to use the word "eggy" in the title of his autobiography was kind of a pushover. The fact that his heart only beat once every year did make the dragon somewhat of interest to mode
- l as a hero for those with cardiac problems. "Eggy Beater" was a national phenomenon, with fifty percent of the book's proceeds going to the American Heart Association.
- Started
- 2012-06-03 23:08:18
- Finished
- 2012-08-17 20:01:59
1 Comments
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SlimWhitman Aug 17 2012 @ 22:31
Quality tail with a lot of heart.