Peter Jackson, maker of Drive-in zombie classic

Peter Jackson, maker of Drive-in zombie classic "Dead Alive" has returned to the Dark side with "The Zombit". Gollum's severed finger is an excuse for zombie-fu, elf-aardvarking

martial arts action but with sharp teeth and strange orange eyes. Jackson is a quality director and the real selling point is the sword juggling

sequence under the strobe lights. (True, he edited out the amputations of joints and whole fingers, but that part hardly competed with the flashy spectacle of the flying swords.)

But then Quentin screamed, "Cut!" He'd all of sudden gotten sick of the whole martial arts thing. It was cheap. It was old. He was becoming a hack. He needed a huge dose of

permethrin, a few lines of crypt dust, and maybe some Jane Austen and Tony Robbins. But a vaporous lady appeared and said, "Quentin, once you gave me this ..." But the music box

suddenly stopped playing, and the lady vanished. Only her voice lingered, echoing in my mind... "Quentin, Quentin..." I looked about nervously, trying to understand whether

I wondered if all the gruesome movies I had made triggered my subconscious into creating such a hallucination. I vowed to make no more movies like 'Kill Bill' or Pulp Fiction. Chi

cago! (Now there's a film I wish they would have let me make! All those chicks in fishnets. Except Queen Latfah. I wouldn't have cast her. She gives me heartburn.) Yeah, Kill Bill

was pretty obnoxious, but at least nobody talks about it anymore like Slenderman. Seriously, the video game industry's ruined by memes & pandering to base instincts & egocentrism.