Cannon balls was a euphemism that'd backfired

Cannon balls was a euphemism that'd backfired back into his face. Cassandra wasn't the type of woman to let such a claim go unverified and her cutlass ensured a docile subject for

good old fashioned circus routines. She backed him into the 50 foot long metal cylinder. Climbing in he noticed the sides were greased. She ordered Iago to point the cannon at

the far end of Cancun, "because," as she explained in her dulcet tones, "if he misses land, he can swim." His eyes flared in fear. "Please, miss, not the water!" She lit the cannon

with a skull and crossbones lighter given to her by her grandma, one of the original Hell's Angels biker chicks. It was her lucky charm, and she hoped it would work on this boat

But he was just a taste of things to come. When they'd weighed anchor and exited the harbor, Kay saw the Captain appeared on Deck. His scaly claws, gills and black carapace

intriguired her to no end. "Do you come by way of Innsmouth?" Kay crooned. The Captain, dripping seaweed, replied through slimy lips, "Yesh, we come frum a gud family." The ship

reeked of salami. Benny the cabin chef was cooking another one of his infamous 'meat surprises'. Known for their high

Rocky Mountain Oyster content, they were undoubtedly the most popular dish ever served, so long as nobody knew the secret. The secret, of course, was

puréed puppy penis.