Hi slept in a sleeping bag mounted to the

Hi slept in a sleeping bag mounted to the wall and his alarm went off at a random time. He dranks his tang and ate his tootsies. It was all part of his regiment.

That's how became Evil Kneivel. What people don't know about him is that every March 3 he

traded his bike for a bikini.Evil went Kneivel for bikinis.

the loving arms of his set designer, Wicked Weasel. Kneivel just didn't feel "evil" anymore, & the actual hordes of Satan had sued him for self-libel. Kneivel removed the swimwear

And replaced with reptilian clothes in six colours. Coco Chanel noticed something unique and hired him for the promotional staff. Knievel loved his new job so much that the

bought himself a sandwich. He went to work, munching on the sandwich. He observed the clothes. As he opened his mouth to comment, mayo dripped out, covering the reptillian clothes.

"From your head down to your toes / You have but one set of reptilian clothes..." warned his mother, clearly tired of scrubbing the stains off his scales. He rolled his slit eyes

open. Even after the light had caught them it still seemed like looking into the heart of darkness. Then suddenly he was there. Maybe less than inch from your face. How did that

puddle of piss get beneath me?